Will life ever be smooth-flowing? After constantly contacting CYFD (New Mexico’s department for protecting kids) for information (i.e., is there a class for parenting troubled kids?) for almost three years and never getting a response, I did something stupid. I emailed them with a demand for help or information. Result: they came out to investigate, decided Grandpa and I were “abusive,” and moved the kids to my single daughter’s house.

Did you know that time-outs are considered torture and that scolding is now illegal? They claim that “calmly discussing” things with children will get the desired results. Now I understand why so many kids have absolutely no clue what discipline is, or how to handle the word “no,” or how to overcome disappointment — and go to school with guns to shoot teachers!

In the almost three years we’ve had them, these grandkids went from being feral (as described by the therapist) to being half-way decent people. They were taught how to eat using silverware at a table with the whole family (something they knew nothing about), how to use the toilet (they were still wetting their pants and bed at age 7), how to say things like “please,” “thank you,” and “excuse me,” and learned to do things like read, cursive writing, and feeding animals. Yes, they still have major issues due to the horrible circumstances of their past, but the difference is like night and day. And my single daughter with limited income is doing her best with them, including fun.

Until CYFD decides what they want to do, the entire family is in limbo. A decision was supposed to have been made within 21 days, but its now been three months. This means the poor kids do not know from day-to-day what is going to happen next, they have no food stamps or benefits, no medical appointments; and for emergencies, Grandpa and I have to pay cash for anything they might need, including Emergency Room visits. Meanwhile, the bills pile up and we wait for the government to release those poor kids and us before we can move forward.

Rather than sit and fret, Grandpa and I have focused on winterizing the house and working on repairs. The exterior walls were a mess even before we moved in, but new cracks had shown up. Just look at the progress!!

Here’s some of the “before” pictures:

Compare with the half-way point:

And now the finished product.

It was all done with the base paint we had acquired before the kids arrived. We hope to be able to save up enough to buy some paint to finish the job this spring. The section of wall that was missing stucco now has foam sheets and plywood. We are planning on installing a front door there in the spring.

How about a light brick color for the walls? We’re not sure yet. We’ll need about 20-25 gallons of paint for that, and we really don’t want to mess up on the color!

Any suggestions?